Mehmet Oz is not, shall we say, the ideal senatorial candidate for the GOP to be running in a purplish state like Pennsylvania. But in politics all things are relative and his Democratic opponent, John Fetterman, has some baggage of his own. Back in 2013, when he was mayor of some podunk town in the Keystone State, Fetterman chased down a black jogger in his pickup truck, menaced him with a shotgun, and told the cops who responded to the scene that having heard shots in the area, he was detaining a suspect. The jogger, 28-year-old Christopher Miyares, was dressed in running togs and wearing headphones. One of the officers patted him down, finding no weapon of any kind, and he was released. Fetterman being a good progressive, his racist antics were politely overlooked and today’s he’s Pennsylvania’s lieutenant governor. Say what you will about Doc Oz, but he’s got nothing like that on his resume…
It seems that among Millennials, “quiet quitting” is all the rage. The idea is that when you’re at work, you should do as little as possible without getting yourself fired. This, you see, is a way of striking back at your predatory employer while practicing self-care and mindfulness and other good stuff. Sure, the slackers and half-steppers have always been with us—but now their lack of ambition and unwillingness to take the initiative is supported by a veritable slacker ideology. Of course, it’s an ideology that would be of no help to people in, say, Africa, who must perform stoop labor to scratch a living out of the ground. Compared to that bare-bones lifestyle, the dark Satanic mills of Google or Amazon seem positively plush…
You may have heard that “our democracy” is under attack by that sinister, nihilistic sect, the GOP. Democrats and progressives—pardon the redundancy—have been debating among themselves how to respond to this existential menace. As is well known, however, one of the chief stumbling blocks on the road to “our democracy” is that medieval, racist, proto-fascist document called the Constitution of the United States. Progressives have floated various proposals for amending the Constitution, removing its objectional features and making the future safe for democratic socialism. But now their patience seems to be running out: Writing in the New York Times, Harvard law professor Ryan Doerfler and Yale law professor Samuel Moyn say that progressives should simply take bold action to run the whole thing through a shredder: “The real need is not to reclaim the Constitution, as many would have it, but instead to reclaim America from constitutionalism.” Excuse me? Isn’t that what you people claim that Trump & Co. were doing on January 6, 2021…?
So the new contract agreed to between Minneapolis Public Schools and the Minneapolis Federation of Teachers includes a provision mandating that in the event of layoffs, white teachers should get the boot first. This, you see, will make up for “past discrimination”; Ibram X. Kendi must be smiling. And if you think this might be a bad idea, well, you’re an idiot and a racist—as Michael Harriot, writer, cultural critic and championship-level Spades player, so helpfully explains. See, it’s all about diversity, equity and inclusion. According to Harriot, the Minneapolis Public Schools system is a wasteland of Trump-corrupted white supremacy that can only be salvaged by purging racist white teachers…or something like that, his argument being somewhat incoherent. But that’s the nice thing about being a progressive: Nothing you say or write needs to make sense…